Sunday's Angels

Don't you just love going to church and Sunday's?  I know I do, I feel like I get so much especially in times like now that I am struggling to deal with my new stuff.  I kept praying for angels since Wednesday, and guess what, I got angel's yesterday.  In a kind word, a spontaneous hug, a quick thank you and inspired lessons and discussions.  Then I go to family dinner at grandma's and we have a great discussion and I start to feel better about everything that is going on.  Then off to bed, where I crack open my scriptures and bam, it's right there in front of my face again. I am loved by so many people and so many people keep me walking forward, one foot in front of another!  I am so grateful to all my earthly angels for keeping me smiling and focused on the positive energy so it's easier to hear my Heavenly Father when he is whispering to me, but my crying, and tears have washed out the whispering.  Thank you all!  May God continue to bless me and those around me to feel like your affliction shall be but a moment. 

Books and their effect on my brain!

So lately I have had a hard time dealing with what is on my plate.  Last weekend my mom and me ended up at my very favorite store Barnes and Noble.  I bought a whole bunch of new books.  I know when I am feeling really down and blue that a trip to the book store always makes my day brighter, and it definitely did last weekend.  I tend to notice that the more I spend on books the more depressed I have been, so when I spent well over $100 I knew I must have really needed to decompress.  At the time I didn't know how trying this week would be so I think my spirit must have had an idea of what was going to happen.  This week as I was trying to come to grips with new information and change I started reading to escape what had been going on in my life.  Almost like running away for a weekend but not spending money.  I have stayed up late 2 nights in a row finishing 2 books by the same author.  Now I can't remember her name, I will have to google it.  The two books I read were The Girl Who Chased the Moon, and The Peach Keepers.  Written by Sarah Addison Allen.  They were fantastic, cute, nice escape books.  She write about small Southern towns and people.  Very entertaining and lovely.  If anyone would like to borrow let me know.  They have definitely given me the little bit of escape that I really needed this week. 

This morning I got up and went to the Temple with the girls from our YW to do baptisms.  We didn't need 2 leaders to drive so Sister Lambert picked me up and we picked up the girls.  What a wonderful experience, it never ceases to amaze me the peace and reassurance that you feel in the temple, even if you are only waiting for other people.  I know that Heavenly Father has blessed me tremendously in seeing what was ahead and inspiring the bishop to ask me to serve in the temple on Wednesday mornings.  It really has been my saving grace.

I also found a new fun church blog done by a Seminary Teacher, she talked about keeping a scripture journal and as you are reading the scriptures writing down everything that comes into your mind and your thought and feelings.  I started doing that and starting reading the Book of Mormon again and this week has been super wonderful.  It take a lot of time to write down what you are thinking as you read, but it has been quite wonderful.

So Sorry

So lately my blog has become whiner central, and for that I apologize.  I have had a rough couple of months and still am, but I will try to save those whiny moments for myself.  I really do do other things.  Lately I have been reading.  In fact I just finished another book this week it was Unbroken, about a man and his life growing up and surviving some amazing experiences during WWII.  His plane went down and he survived on a raft for 47 days with no food or water (except what he found and made work).  I was fascinated, what a story of survival things only went on to get worse.  Let me know if you would like to borrow, it is wonderful.  I also finished a story a couple of weeks ago called I Am Asher Lev.  This is a story of a Jewish boy and his struggle with his religion and his life.  He was an artist and this brought so much pain and hurt to him and his family and his struggle with life.  I am now reading a Newberry award winner called Moon over Manifest about a girl that is sent to a town in the middle of the depression while her dad is off working and her adventures of finding out about her dad and how he was as a child.  When I finish that I am going to read a manuscript of a friend that want feed back on a young adult book they have been writing.  So that should be interesting.  I am hanging in there, hope you all are doing well! 

Snow Day

As the big flakes of snow gently fall from the sky, I have been at peace.   I think finally my meds are helping, but I was just diagnosed with a sinus infection, which means I can't take my meds until I have been cleared from infection for 3 wks.  So I feel like we are starting over again.  I try to get it to be two weeks, but I was given a stern talking to by the nurse.  So just as I am beginning to feel better, it will all go away.  I am OK with that.  Because the snow is so beautiful and the quiet so complete, I am complete at least for now. 

Why today, why now?

As the rain patters on the windows and I close my yawning mouth, I am wondering why today has been so great, there were times today that I felt all alone, that the pain and the pressure of being "old" is wearing on me.  That fact that I am not married and not close to being married (this all in a culture that preaches marriage and family), yet so want to be married and have a family.  It is this thought that has tears streaming down my face.  I know I need to be patient, but how long is that going to be?  I feel like the kid in the back of the car who keeps asking how much longer, are we there yet?  How many more minutes until we reach our destination.  How many more minutes of crying and weeping must I endure.  Then I started thinking about what has been all over the news lately, and more and more I realize that I might just be seeing the Savior come, and am I ready?  Am I prepared?  Am I worthy?  So many questions so little time....

Wonderful Wednesday's

So as I may have mentioned I started working in the Temple on Wednesday's in the morning.  The shift goes from 5:30 am to 12 noon.  It has been a great blessing so far.  This week on my "schedule" as you rotate through different things I was a "sealing patron".  Me being new to the whole temple thing didn't know what that meant.  I was super nervous and exciting.  I made my way to 3rd floor of the temple and dressed.  What a wonderful experience.  I was overcome with the spirit and even just reliving this experience right now I am in tears.  May of you know that the spirit is directly related to my tear ducts.  Well sitting there in the sealing room on Wednesday I reflected on my life and where I thought it would go and where it has gone.  The sealer stopped and shared so insight from President Faust which was moving and as we began ordinances again I tried to concentrate on the names and had a prayer in my heart that they would understand what we were doing for them.  At one point at the start of an ordinance I was overcome with the spirit and felt like we were surrounded by those for whom we were preforming the ordinance.  The sealer was overwhelmed and as tears streamed down his face and mine, I knew that family was there.  That they had been waiting, that they were prepared and that joy was breath taking.  I am so thankful for the opportunity that I have to serve in this capacity.  What a wonderful blessing!

Life is looking up

Ok so life is looking up.  Or maybe it is that I am looking up.  I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  The sunshine, the blue sky, who knows, what has changed, only that I don't think I can keep feeling terrible forever!   Oh well I will run with it!

Another Day another crisis

Do you ever just wish the crisis's would end?  Work crisis, health crisis, church issues, friend issues?  I really need to get a break here, but today it has all come to a head.

Got to work early to try to get ready for the day before the interviews came, didn't really happen.  We did interviews and went late.  Got back to work with 5 people sitting in my lobby upset that I made them wait, hurry got them in and ran off the the Dr's appt, my heart rate not so good when I get there, trying to decide what to do about it, Dr gets paged from the ER (he is on call today).  Listen to him talk with the ER Dr for 20 minutes trying to figure out what is wrong with poor lady in the ER.  He focuses his attention on me again to be interrupted by the ER again.  Getting back to the heart rate we discuss what to do, add meds, live with it, etc....  He wants to start med specific "beta blocker"  I can't take that because of asthma, he looks it up, thinks it "may be ok", ask him to call pulm Dr, he says maybe not...  Do surgery???  Live with it????  We make a decision and then move on.  Run back to work desk is stacked with paperwork (where did that all come from)?  Run around all day help Pt's, boos says can you believe it's 6pm?  Freak out, people are coming to my house at 7 and it's 6:15.  Tell my boss I have to go, no options.  Pile everything up throw it in a drawer and run out, I have 3 messages on the cell.  Listen to them, issues with YW tonight (the thing at my house at 7).  Call her back figure it out, call mom to see if someone is home, can't reach anyone, start to freak out, call cell # no answer, call Dad, he is home, call person back tell them to come.  Get other messages.  Friend having a crisis, needs help right away, other Dr's office called they need to talk to me (good bad????)  call back they are gone for the day, call friend tell her I will come over after thing at my house. 
Thing at the house, turns out ok, not great, but who really cares, clean up kick people out etc....  Leave for friends house, OMG I am out of gas, stop for gas, OMG it went up 25 cents from this morning!  Call friend leave a message I am on my way, fill up, get on freeway, get a text, get off freeway, friend says don't come, text her back, turn around go home.  Friend texts back, pull over, read text, still head home, get call from friend, pull over, she wants me to come back, turn around head back to her house, drop stuff off, help her with the issue, make her promise to call first thing make sure she is ok.  Turn around come back home, mail is spilling out of the mail box, get the mail, pull up the email send email, tell her I am thinking about her, that i love her.  Go through mail, get card from other friend, she is wonderful, not sure how I would have made it through the day with everything, she is beyond wonderful, inspired.  Type this way to long narrative and them I am going to bed.  Hope I wasn't too boring, my life is out of control, I need for something to go right for a change, tomorrow is a day that I have that possibility.  Pray for my friend in crisis, she needs it way more then I do!  Peace out, good night!

Busy Bee

So today I started working in the Temple.  I was so nervous I thought I was going to throw-up, but guess what everything was fine!  In fact I am sure this will be a wonderful experience!  I am happy to be serving the Lord in another capacity!  When I was set apart I was given some pretty spectacular promises, it was a wonderful thing.  In the meeting with President Christensen he spoke of wounds unseen, I feel like I have been dealing with so many of these that it has been hard to be real to myself.  I know that things will get better, that I must learn to have more patience.  Hope everyone is doing well! 

I just posted on my family blog, so I decided to post it here as well, you should all get most of it, if not just laugh at me, it's ok! 

PLEASE READ PARAGRAPH 4, I NEED HELP WITH IDEAS TO SPEAK IN SACRAMENT ABOUT!  Please leave a comment and help me out!

My life has been super crazy lately and it has been awhile since I have gotten on. Yes I agree this should be the Becky and Lana exchange stories, etc... Blog. Life here in Utah has been pretty dang cold as of lately. For several days early this week it did not get above 20 degree's. Needless to say my walk into the hospital has been super cold as we have to park out in the north 40.
My life has been all over the map lately. My arthritis has been super bad lately that another stress dose of prednisone was needed to allow me to bend my arm. I started a new medication that has a list of really scary side effects but hopefully it helps. This medication is generic so it's cheap, the next medication is $2000 a month so I am hoping we don't have to go there. But the nausea, sores in my mouth and my hair falling out is starting to kind of freak me out. We just doubled the medicine that I have to take to counter act the side effects, so maybe that will help, it will be another couple of weeks before we find out if things are working or not.
I am loving my job, my boss is great, my patients and their families are great. We just had a major change so I think everything will now fall into place. I love the fact that the cute old people are in need of a person who cares and will listen to them. Their stories are fascinating and wonderful. Their courage and determination inspired me to no end. Oh the places you will go the things you will do, the people you will meet! Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful!

I am still in Young Women's and loving every minute of it. The girls are wonderful and so caring. They are full of energy and love and I love them so much. It is so much fun to see them get older and wiser and move on to better things. I just accepted an assignment to work in the temple on Wed mornings. I am excited but a little nervous about things, but I am sure it will be wonderful! I was asked to talk in Sacrament meeting in a couple of weeks, which I really don't like doing, but I must need to. Anyone with advise on speaking on The proclamation to the World on the family, please send ideas my way.
Travel plans so far this year are a week in northern California salmon fishing with my family, we are renting a house right by the beach and it should be a great adventure for all of us. I then am going to spend a week driving up the Oregon coast with a friend (that is still in the planning phase so hopefully it will turn out). I plan on spending a few days in AZ visiting my grandma and grandpa wood. Girls camp is in August, family reunion over Labor day weekend. I am sure a couple other fun things are to come as well.
I really miss you all in Florida. I occasionally have dreams that I am there to visit. I am hoping that happens maybe next year, we will see. Spring time sounds nice for a warm weather get away.
How are thing with the family? Kids still doing well? Bethany, Jake? I heard Megan had her baby and he is cute (according to LaNece). Several of my friends are expecting and I am super excited for them. I feel like I am writing a book, so I will finish and be done for another little bit.
Keep in touch, I miss you all and love our family not matter how far away, I am sending my love and prayer and thoughts your way! May the Lord bless and keep you safe until we meet again!

Just Keep on Going

This winter has been terrible so far.  My arthritis has gotten worse and we are now considering a "chemo" drug to see if it helps.  I finally and back to walking like a normal person, the last 4 weeks have been extremely painful and challenging mentally to keep things in perspective.  It is easy to forget how blessed I am and get lost in the self pity and loneliness that feels like it can be consuming.  I need to take a good look around and realize how much I have been given and how much more I need to give back.  I find myself sad and depressed and lashing out at my family, something I try not to do, but sometimes feel is the only option.  I am trying to come up with some New Year resolutions and I am struggling to see anything positive that is up coming.  Even my birthday was hard, not sure what this is all about, but I am determined to get over myself and keep moving forward.  I have come to a realization that my Iaido is done and over with, my Dr keeps telling me if I want to be walking in 5 years I will do what he tells me.  I will, I just don't know how to overcome the hole that has been created.  Earlier this week I was actually feeling much better, but I am not getting pain and stiffness in my neck and Oh My Heck, I really have been doing everything right, not sure why I keep getting knocked down.  My saving graces right now are my weekly temple attendance (it makes me laugh the the ladies know who I am now), and my young women's calling.  The girls continue to inspire and uplift me at every turn.  Well I best stop whining now and get off my butt and do something.  Keep smiling, I am going to try!

December Has Been Crazy Busy

December started off with the Wood Family annual Christmas activity.  My mom gets us all together to do something every year.  This years excursion was to see The Forgotten Carol's at cottonwood high school.  It was a very fun night and we all enjoyed it.  The music was wonderful, the show it didn't see too much of due to a head, but it was wonderful.

Next came the making of neighborhood treats to share. This year I made Carmel apples, and Carmel pretzel sticks made gourmet with milk and white chocolate drizzle and some with nuts and some with peppermint sticks.

 Then came the decorating the tree, what fun this year!  Clara is old enough to want to help but young enough not to know how.  All the kids had fun decorating the tree!

Next was the making of gingerbread houses and let the kids the freedom to do as they pleased.  This year mom bought gingerbread house boxes.  It made it easy for the kids to get things up and running quickly.  The kids had a ton of fun and their house turned out super cute and fun!

 Next up in traditions is the Robinson Family Christmas party.  It is always on the 23rd come rain, snow or shine.  This year grandpa did a spotlight on the birth of Joseph Smith and how it coincides with the celebration of the birth of our Savior.  It was a touching moment.

Then came Christmas Eve at our house, with games, presents, kids, cookies, stories and fun.  I am not sure that I like the kids new Shock game, but everything else was super fun!

The boys then showed me how to do a pants head dance, and I laughed the whole time!

Here is Taylor showing me how to make a moose of myself!

Hunter break dancing.

Next comes Christmas morning.  Which is really more Christmas noon.  I got up early and and made raspberry rolls (which didn't turn out right).  I also made homemade baked doughnuts that were delicious.  Definitely a make again thing.  They were easy and wonderful and everyone seemed to like them!

From My House to ours, may The Reason for the Season, bring peace, love, hope and joy!  Merry Christmas!

30 Days of Thanks #30

So today should be my big finale, but I am so sick that my mom had to come get me from work, I couldn't drive myself home.  I will do my big finale as soon as I feel better

30 Days of Thanks #29

Today I am thankful for a hot bath, that after writing this post I am going to sit in and hopefully feel better.  I have come down with a sinus infection and feel like my head is going to explode.  The hot shower I took this morning seemed to help, I hope a bath tonight will be equally helpful.  Hot water, house, heating, towels, clothes, food, job.  I am thankful for all the essentials that I regularly take for granted. 

30 Days of Thanks # 28

As this month draws to an end, I would be ungrateful if I failed to be thankful to the most important person in my life.  Our brother and our Savior Jesus Christ.  I am so thankful for the knowledge of knowing that when I make mistakes I can repent and be forgiven completely.  I am thankful for his atoning sacrifice which makes it possible to return to live with Him and our loving Heavenly Father.  The calming reassurance that our lives have hope, that we can return, that we will be forgiven, that those things will be remembered no more is beautiful and something I am truly grateful for!  With the celebration of his birth just around the corner, I am going to try to be better, be more like him, to love him more, to serve him more, to forgive and forget more, to accept more, to judge less.  This list can go on and on and on! 

30 Days of Thanks #27

Today I am thankful for this wonderful blog that I have to express myself, my life, my feelings, my heartaches, my joys, my stupid thoughts that make some of you laugh.  It seems to be more so lately that I get to put down my real feelings with out a fear of someone freaking out, or getting angry at me.  I am grateful for the journal that this has become, I hope to print it out in book form for all posterity.  Keep coming back, I am sure eventually I will be able to say something that will totally steam you or something that you will totally need to hear!  Love you all!

30 Days of Thanks # 26

Today I am thankful for the kind and considerate people who I stood in line with today.  What a pleasure to have such nice people to talk to while freezing my butt off in bitter cold weather.  We got tons of Sub for Santa stuff which will certainly make someones holiday season! 

30 Days of Thanks # 25

Today, it is easy to say that I am grateful for Thanksgiving.  The holiday is one that holds a dear place in my heart.  The family, friends, food, fun, it just warms my heart.  May the Lord bless you and keep you during this wonderful season.  And to all you crazy people, Happy shopping, don't touch a thing in my cart!

30 Days of Thanks # 24

So today I am thankful for, my favorite Thanksgiving dessert, you guessed it PIE.  I am thankful for pumpkin, apple, pecan, cranberry lemon, and lemon meringue.  This is what I am making for the feast, except, the pumpkin, pecan, apple and cranberry lemon are all ready done!  Only need to do a lemon meringue.  Yummy, yummy, stop by tomorrow around 5:30 or 6 pm for pie.  Love you all!