So lately I have been pondering what I am doing here. It seems like my life is stagnant and not going any where, anytime I pray about it I get the same answer "you need to have patience". I have been mad, maybe more the mad, angry may be a better term for it. Not the I smashed my thumb and I can't believe I did that anger, more the What is He thinking? Does he know how much it hurts to keep carrying on and not want to go to bed and never wake up anymore forever again? I know he does it just seems like my life is going nowhere and will continue to go nowhere until I do something, which I can't really do, because I need to have patience!
Thus my venting I apologize, but really what do I have to do to get moving in some direction, preferably in the positive not the negative? I guess keep praying for strength to survive where ever this will take me. No wonder why Satan is working overtime.
Shout out to Laurel who has tried to be my savior 3 times now! Thanks for all that you do and your listening to the spirit and doing as directed! You almost caught me twice, I finally gave in the last time THANK YOU! I just wish I was stronger then I am and that I would keep myself above water like you do, something to look forward to in a better place at a different time.
So now that I am done venting I guess I will go to bed and keep praying for something to make things better! Praying for a calmer, nicer, non-angry me! I know that my family would be happy with anything other then what they have now!